Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Shoe Shopping Horror!

This brisk fall weather reminds me of a time right about a year ago--Pickle was getting close to walking and it was time to check out some of those adorable little baby shoes.

I headed over to Nordstrom to browse their amazing selection of children's shoes. So many choices! The cute liitle Robeez with flowers and kitties on them and the even cuter Pedipeds--just beautiful! Tiny shoes with leopard print or red patent leather. I was picturing some of Pickle's dresses and deciding which shoes to buy.

I was holding a pair of little black velvet Mary Janes when I sensed someone was looking at me. I glanced up and saw group of four or five Nordstrom employees huddled together across the room and staring at me.

They also looked panic-stricken.

I looked confused and one of then said to me in a voice that was trying to remain calm but had a distinct undercurrent of fear "Um--there's a squirrel right behind you."

What?

It took a few seconds for my brain to process everything.
Nordstrom...shoes...squirrel?

SQUIRREL!?!

Now, you know I love animals, but squirrels have always FREAKED ME OUT! I'm scared of squirrels. They're all crazy-like with their darting and scampering. And those big quivery tails

One time a squirrel got into my house. I'll save that story for another post--but it involved the police department and some mops.

So I'm standing there in the Nordstrom's children's shoe department frozen with fear. Then I had visions of the squirrel jumping into my hair--or worse--into the stroller with my sleeping baby.

The Pedipeds fell from my fingers and I high-tailed it across the room to join the huddle.

The scene that followed was right out of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation--people running and screaming, the squirrel skittering under chairs and shoe racks. I half-expected to see the grandpa from Christmas Vacation screaming SQUIIIIIIIIRREL as it it clung to someone's back.

We all watched in horror as the squirrel ran out of the shoe department over to scarves, then back to shoes, then into home furnishings. Some brave souls had a plan to set up a human blockade that trapped the squirrel as others chased it out the door.

And then it was gone.

I retrieved my velvet Pedipeds and paid for them while I joked with my new comrades. "Wow! That was crazy!" we all agreed.

But I've never really enjoyed shoe shopping as much since then... I feel, well, squirrely!
****Check it out****My friend Andrea is having a great giveaway on her blog. She makes beautiful photo cards (she'll be making my Christmas cards!) and will be giving away a free design and is also offering discounts to anyone that comments. Her cards are GORGEOUS!!
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33 comments:

Jennifer said...

Oh, that's hilarious!

Squirrels are cute but they aren't very nice, {well the ones I've encountered anyway}. ;D

Happy Wednesday!

Jen said...

All I have to say is only you, that is something that would only happen to you and of course it is totally hilarious.

JANE said...

ROFL, I LOVE this! I can't even think of anything witty to say I'm laughing too much!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ronda's Rants said...

Too funny...
I don't mind squirrels...but I do mind rats and mice! Scary!
An innocent looking but so not older gentleman in church the other day put a plastic roach on my shoulder in church the other day! Then... while in cahoots with my Hubby said...Ronda, there's something on your sweater. I saw it...jumped up and screamed during the benediction...our Pastor said Ronda are you okay?
I just about died.
So I stared at both of them while they laughed like 12 year olds!
I told our Presbyeterian congregation...that the spirit moved me!
I hate cock roaches too!
I think guys never grow up!
They will always want to tease a girl to the day they die!

Jennifer said...

OMG Ronda--that's too funny!!

Becky said...

I gotta tell you. You never dissapoint! You r stories ar so funny! I think that could only happen to you!

justjuli said...

I love squirrels...... from a safe distance, though!

What a story!

Kori said...

This was HILARIOUS.

I used to work at Parisians several years ago and we had a bird that flew in circles around the ceiling. They actually had to set up nets to catch him.

April said...

LMAO! LOVELOVELOVE the visual aid!

Heather said...

OMG - that picture is HILARIOUS!!!

But I'm jealous that you live in proximity to a Nordstrom's. We have none here in my corner of the world. Sigh.

I too am suspicious of squirrels. They're just so...so... SQUIRELLY. They're also the only critter I've ever hit with my car - twice over the years, one has run into the road and I couldn't avoid squooshing him, because swerving or braking would've led to an accident. I still have nightmares about the feel of a squirrel skull going under my tires. *shudder*

At least you got the cute shoes!! :D

Ashley said...

Oh, goodness! This is just too much! I already had the Christmas Vacation scene in my head and then that picture was just too much! ROFL!!! This story is seriously just too good. Now I'm ready to go watch Christmas Vacation - quite possibly my favorite movie of all times.

Mimi said...

I once had a squirrel invade my apartment. They freak me out too!

DysFUNctional Mom said...

How bizarre! I once had a sugar glider jump into my hair, but that was at a pet store, so it makes a little more sense!

Jeauxdi said...

Ok...I am a SHOE FREAK DIVA and NOW I am gonna be freaked out shoe shopping! LOL
That had to be scarey! Thank goodness you and babe' made it out safe! WHEW!

I have given you an award! Come by my place to get it!!! =0)

Have a giggly day!

Temple said...

I was very perplexed at first as to how the words "shoe shopping" and "horror" could ever be linked together! ;) But then I read "children's shoes" and started to see the light (I used to work retail at a very large department store here in the South and getting stuck working in the children's shoe section was like our version of being sent to Siberia for political crimes). But the squirrel I never saw coming! Hilarious!

Jen B. said...

OMG! That is hysterical! I would have probably fainted... congrats on getting Pickle away calmly! LOL

BTW - I left something for you over on my blog... hope you like it!

SuZ said...

Holy crap!!!! Oh, the things you endure!! :)

Hey, check out my blog today. I am showing your some bloggy love by giving you an award!!

Allison said...

Love the "Nat'l Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" reference...one of my all-time faves!

I can see why shoe shopping has never been the same. LOL

sandi said...

I was a nanny in ATL before I started this mom business. Anyway. A squirrel came in the house while I was alone with the kids. I almost died! I love watching squirrels outside, but indoors where they are scared and skittish, you never know what they will do. I would have died too in Nordstrom! I don't blame you for still getting the willies while shoe shopping.

However, it made a great story and I sat here laughing and screaming while reading it!

Aubrey said...

OMGosh! The visual is priceless!

I hate me some squirrels too! My FIL is ALWAYS feeding the ones around his house. We went to visit a couple weeks ago and the FATTEST squirrel I have ever seen ran right up to me. I screamed. And freaked.

CaraBee said...

What a funny story!! Now I want to hear the squirrel in the house story! We have so many squirrels around here that I'm surprised it has never happened to us. Keeping my fingers crossed that it never does.

Sera said...

That is so dang funny! I'm looking forward to the story about squirrels, cops, and mops.

Susie said...

That is a CRAZY story:-)

Z's Mom said...

That is a hilarious story! I love squirrels....but yeah, I wouldn't want to meet one in a dark alley or anything.

Jenni Jiggety said...

Squirrels are sketchy...can't be trusted!

andrea said...

Spiders freak me out as well as small rodent type things...and you already know about my "horse thing". Is Nordstrom near some woods, or what? Weird.

andrea said...

OMG! I just totally remembered my mouse story when I saw the other post! Short and sweet: Andrea buys new couch...Andrea brings home new couch and puts in living room...pretty pretty...Andrea relaxing on new pretty couch and having an intense "heart to heart" with the boyfriend...what's that brushing across my back?...no, not my hair; it's not that long...WTF! See Andrea run...mouse in new couch...see Andrea awake until 2:00am trying to catch said mouse. Yippee for sticky traps!! I guess that wasn't so short...what a blabbermouth I am.

noble pig said...

Okay,I was in the Nordstrom Kid shoes today and nothing this exciting happened! I laughed so hard at your pic too!

breelyn_faith said...

LOL! That is Hilarious! you tell the story so well. I felt like I was right there with you the whole time. Squirrels are so weird. My son loves to chase them and when he does the squirrel will stand there like na-na-na-na you can't get me. Making his noises at him and twitching his tail around. And ofcourse Andrew always loves a good challenge so when Andrew decides to chase the squirrel the squirrel takes off up the tree. Squirrels are so squirrely. Have good one! Loved the story! :-)

Lori said...

LOL! When I was at the Mall in D.C. the squirrels came right up to me to beg for my M&Ms. They climbed up my leg and sat in my lap when I sat down!

Shannon said...

Well I just commented that alive birds freak me out! Squirrels I can handle! I even had one sit in my lap and eat a chocolate chip cookie out of my hand once... while we were at Disney World!

And I so want to hear about the squirrel in your house!

Dee from Downunder said...

I have personally never met/seen a live squirrel, but I can imagine they would be skittish when cornered, yet they look so cute!

Acacia said...

I used to do my shoe shopping through Boscovs, it saves time & money too.