Thursday, August 28, 2008

I Miss Spiderman!

There have been a lot of beautifully written posts on the Internets recently about parental first day of school angst. I know I can't do justice to this topic as eloquently as many have, but I do want to tell you about the first day craziness over here.

This year has been an especially tough one for me because Andy started high school and Gooser started kindergarten. A double whammy!

I'm doing okay though, considering, and I do still have Pickle here which certainly helps! I was able to get Andy on the bus without crying though, but as I walked home, I had to fight down that lump in my throat and try to not let the thought four more years and he'll be in college. COLLEGE!! enter my mind. I got through it, but I am painfully aware that his time as a kid that goes off to school and is here every evening is dwindling. I know how fast four years can go by--they will rumble by in a series of first days and Halloweens and concerts and graduations and summers. And then they will be gone.

Yesterday we went over to Gooser's classroom to organize his school supplies. We had to label every. single. pencil. and. marker. Thanks Teach! But Gooser was thrilled to be in the classroom and was SO proud of his shiny new folders and, of course, his Spiderman backpack.

Last night he went to bed early. As I was tucking him in he said, giggling "Mommy tomorrow is DAY ONE of kindergarten!" He just couldn't wait!

Then, at about 11 p.m., I heard this hideous barking cough coming from his room that could only mean one thing: The Croup.

Nooooooooooo! Not on the first day of kindergarten!!

Now I am very well-trained in The Croup as every one of my kids has had it multiple times. I know the drill--steam in the shower, go out into cool night air, back to the shower. Discourage crying--that makes it so much worse. Tylenol is a good distraction.

After about two hours he was calm and still coughing, but it wasn't sounding nearly as frightening as it had earlier. So my next dilemma was--do I sent him to school or keep him home?

I HATE it when parents send sick kids to school--I never do it, I swear--but he seemed so much better this morning I decided to let him go. He still had a cough but it didn't sound croupy and he wasn't feverish or lethargic.

The morning was a frenzy of waffles and backpacks and tooth brushing--I didn't have any time to fret about my baby going to kindergarten. When we got to school there were kids and parents everywhere to distract me. When I got back home there was Pickle play time and phone calls and, of course, blogging! I was doing alright! No crying here.

But then I went up to his room and saw his Spiderman costume (the one he wears all day, every day) crumpled on the floor. Then I lost it.

My Spiderman won't be here. And I thought about all the questions he usually asks all day long (he talks a lot!) about Spiderman and Batman, dinosaurs and cavemen, butterflies and bees. All the drawings, the paper airplanes, the hugs...

Ugh. I can't write anymore. Why does it have to be so hard??
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22 comments:

Ronda's Rants said...

I know...each milestone is a blessing and a curse. We raise them to leave us and it is really as simple as that. The better they are at leaving you (I don't mean yelling and slamming the door) but rather just Good-bye Mom and Dad see you later, that very excitement at getting to start school...shows what a great job you are doing! I remember the pain so well...when my oldest started college...I cried the entire 10 hour ride home. I find shopping is the best medicine...

Jennifer said...

LOL Ronda--I think I'll take your advice and do some shopping--great idea!!

Andrea said...

oh i still have 4 days with isaac until he starts kindy. i'm excited but sad all at the same time. he only goes half a day though so *really* i only get 3.5 hours without him, then he'll be back home talking my ear off. ;0)

oº˚ Anissa ˚ºo said...

I was the same way when my kids were in public school! I hated it! Now I school them and don't have to send them. It's a job in itself but wouldn't change it for the world.

Kori said...

Awww Jennifer. They have to grow up sometime. I'm still trying to comprehend how my sweet and wonderful Jacob is now in Middle School. What happened? When did he grow up so fast? I feel you honey.

Maggie, Dammit said...

Ohhhhh.

I saw your tweet about the croup, what awful luck! At least he didn't miss the big day, I think you made the right decision. And I totally understand about the crumpled spiderweb costume... I'm sure the Littlest Petshop and Barbie shoes and abandoned Curious George Underwear in size 3T strewn all about the living room will have a similar effect on me.... :(

*sigh*

Jo-Jo said...

Oh my, I am not looking forward to that myself. THANK GOD I have some time before I do...but I am sure it will only seem like yesterday when it happens.

Lori said...

Alright, miss girly-girl, now you've done it. I do not tear up at blog posts. I don't cry much at all, and certainly not about blogs. Until today.

Is it weird that I'm thinking, I'm SO glad you didn't get Gooser's hair cut short??

Jennifer said...

LOL Lori--I'm glad too! I'd probably be in a straitjacket right now if he had short hair!

forgetfulone said...

Oh, I remember that feeling! You did write about it, and quite eloquently, I might add. He's gonna be fine, mama, and so are you.

Kori said...

this is an eloquent a post as I have read; no fear. Between the haircut and school starting and everything, I am amazed you are holding up so well. They say the first one is the hardest, but I think they are liars!

Gillie said...

I'm extra tired and emotional today. I'm all teary-eyed for you. Something about the spidey costume crumpled on the floor got to me. I hope he puts it back on when he gets home!

Rhea said...

Awww!! It's bittersweet, I know.

I'm sorry he had a croup but glad he's so much better.

What an adorable pack of children you have!

Kelly said...

Oh, I feel for you!!! I'm glad he seems to be feeling a little better today...I've never heard of taking a croupy kid out into the cool air after the steam...does that help?
Hope spidey had a good 1st day!!

Jennifer said...

Thank you Everybody! Your support really helps! Also, thank you for saying it was well-written--I appreciate that!

Kelly--Yes, going into the night air can really help. Once when Teddy had croup it was so scary-sounding that Don decided to take him to the ER--but by the time they got there is was better! The dr.s said that happens a lot b/c the cool air fixes it. Crazy!!

Shannon said...

You have written a great post, Jennifer!

I'm sure Gooser had a blast on his first day!

Tami said...

Oh Jen, I am right there with you. I will NOT let Mateo see me cry, but I will do it. He is my baby boy and now he isnt gonna be here during the day to help me with Micaela. I still have til next thurs with him though!! I am gonna miss him!!

Ronda's Rants said...

Come on over to my blog for a sec...I have an award for you!

Elfie33 said...

Oh I know how hard that is...been there. The agency I work for we deal with a lot of single mom's, and the first day of school here I don't know how many mom's we had in here crying their eyes out. So you weren't alone. Hope he stays excited about Kindergarden. I asked this little boy today if he liked it. He said "no my teacher has mean eyes"...lol

noble pig said...

Let me just say First grade is no better. Why did it kill me yesterday. But I remember leaving Kindergarten and sobbing and feeling like OMG their whole world is ahead of them and just cried all the way home.

Jaime said...

aww, you made me cry too. that was really sweetly written!

DYSFUNCTIONAL MOM said...

Awww, what a sweet post.