Tuesday, September 23, 2008

I Fly Through the Air With the Greatest of Ease...

Point blank: I was on a trapeze yesterday. A real trapeze, like in the circus! With ropes and pulleys and nets and REALLY tall ladders!

I mean, like this:
That's me!! And you know what's even braver than going up on that crazy thing? Me posting this pic on the Internets--I can't believe how freaking fat I look in these trapeze pics! The combination of the angle and the thick tightly-cinched belt = NOT good! But there ya go--me at my most vulnerable--belted and swinging high in the sky!

So this is how it went down: I was driving home after running some errands and I noticed this huge trapeze set-up in the park with signs about trapeze lessons. The kids would love this I thought, so I went home to get them.

Turns out, you could sign up for classes of just do a test "flight" or whatever you call it in trapeze-talk (trapeze-eze hee hee!). Teddy and Patrick wanted to do it and, for reasons I'm still not clear on, I said I did too. Then I paid for it and there was no turning back.

Andy and Gooser had zero interest in doing it--but they had a cute mini trapeze and trampoline for little kids and Gooser was happy to play on that. I like this pic of Gooser--look how his hair is bouncing! Also: Gooser dressed himself yesterday. He came downstairs and said "Look Mommy! I put on a striped shirt and striped pants" LOL!
So the first thing they did was strap on these most unflattering belts. They have you raise your arms and suck in your gut so they can cinch them as tight as humanly possible. I cannot stress how ugly this was on me. Then we got a brief lesson in what to do once we were holding onto the trapeze.

By the way, I was the ONLY adult doing this! So I lined up with the kids and we went in order of size--smallest to tallest.

Patrick went first. He has no fear and didn't hesitate.
Teddy started freaking and tried to back out, but he got his nerve up and really had fun!
Then it was my turn. Gulp! I put this white chalky stuff on my hands and climbed this narrow ladder that was--no exaggeration--30-40 feet high! I can't even climb a six foot ladder to change a light bulb! What was I thinking?

Here I am on the ladder and this is the last pic I can show--they're just too ugly!
The ladder-climbing was SCARY!! Especially at the very top because you had to climb onto this tiny platform that was wobbling in the wind.

Then the other really scary part was standing on the edge of the platform and leaning straight out while a guy held onto my belt. So, like, leaning out over the edge, straight-backed--it was just like one of those "trust" exercises.

Then another guy pulled the trapeze in so I could grab on and the belt-holding guy said he was going to count to three and then I was supposed to jump off the platform.

Can you believe this?

So I start swinging through the air while a guy on the ground shouted stuff like "feet forward, feet back."

I can't say I enjoyed it. See, I'm one of those types that can't go on amusement park rides--not because I'm scared, but because I'm so susceptible to motion sickness and dizziness.

I felt really dizzy the whole time and I was relieved when the guy said "When I count three you're going to let go."

I was happy to let go! Then there was a controlled fall (because of the ropes) down to the net. Then I had to crawl across the net and somersault off the side and down to the ground. Don't forget I'm wearing that awful belt--talk about humiliating. And--wow--my arms were (still are!) SO sore! Quite a workout!!

But at least I can say I did it! I can cross "Flying on a Trapeze" off my "Bucket List." Oh wait, that wasn't on my bucket list. So I'm officially adding and crossing off trapeze flying to my bucket list!

Speaking of circus-related things--I won a contest! A contest on My Semblance of Sanity about how our lives compared to a circus and which role we play in our "family circus." Michelle said my answer made her laugh the hardest *blush* and I won this terrific picture book called "Sidewalk Circus." Thank you Michelle! And very appropriate, don't you think, given my recent circus shenanigans!?!

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26 comments:

Becky said...

That is soo great!!! I am like that too with motion sickness. I'm not scared, but get sick feeling quickly. (Note to self if you ever go on a cruise...you are stuck on that blasted ship for DAYS, and if you get motions sickness...Tough shit! Medicine is too late and there is nothing but water for miles!!...sorry long rant)
I think it's great that you gave this a try. When I was little my grandfather had made a trapeeze for us. We spent hours on that thing.

Your little boy with the curls and stipes is friggin adorable!

Mamahut said...

My youngest is terrified of heights...finally a reason for me to stay on the ground. You do not look fat you silly girl, your a picture of fun!

Dee said...

Well done! I would not have made it up the ladder!

Ronda's Rants said...

So cool...you are my hero! I am such a scaredy cat...I don't think I could have done it! But you did it...way to go girl!!!

oº˚ Homeschool Mom˚ºo said...

That looks like so much fun! I bet yall had a blast! Thanks for sharing -- Much Love --

Jennifer said...

Brave, brave woman! It looks pretty high up. *gulp* but oh so much fun! lol!

Kudos for trying it! :)

Jo-Jo said...

You are my hero...There is NO WAY I would have been able to do that! And by the way, I think you look GREAT!

Anonymous said...

You truly lived a charmed life! Who just "happens to see" a trapeze in the park???? Seriously!!!! You crack me up! I would love to see more pics....but I totally understand how you "think" you look that way...I see myself that way all the time. I do love all the pics you did post and I'm impressed by Gooser's outfit. Nice job, Gooser!

Nice segue into the win too.....congratulations!

I'm serious....you are CHARMED!!!!

Lori said...

Wow, great form in that first picture! You're a natural!

I am still jealous of Gooser's Pantene hair. Love that outfit too. That's Emily's idea of matching. "But the shirt has flowers on it and the skirt has flowers on it so they match!" I have no problem with her picking her own outfits, I just with I could hang a sign around her neck saying "My mommy did not dress me today."

"Trapeze-eze" -- you silly woman! :D

Shannon said...

Oh, I was hoping you had pics of this! Looks like fun! And how cool are you, the only adult to do it! :)

Kori said...

I think you are so brave! I don't know that I would make it up the ladder, much less be able to jump off, belt or no belt. Your kids are so lucky to have you as a mom!

Aleta said...

I'm with you on the motion sickness. I've had it since I was a child and never outgrew it! Bravo to you for flying through the air. It's something I would like at think, "If I had the nerve and a stomach that didn't lurch at the thought." Thanks for letting your readers live through your experience! Great pictures by the way.

Anonymous said...

You rock! In a million years I would never do this...I'm jealous of your willingness to try! Your kids will always remember it!

Susie said...

You are my new hero!! How great for you!! You look like you had so much fun!! Good for you:-)

amelia bedelia said...

wow! You are TOO cool! and brave.

Jennifer said...

Thank you Everybody!! And I forgot to tell you the best part--the muscular guy who helped me somersault off the side said I was "graceful"!! I was lot of things on that trapeze--but I don't think graceful was one of them!!

Insane Mama said...

We had that in our neighborhood too! We had a blast. You don't look fat at all

Kelly said...

That is so cool...what a brave woman you are! I wouldn't have even gotten to the top of the ladder!

Congrats on winning the contest!

Anonymous said...

Oh my Goodness - you're kids had to have loved that! My father-in-law did one a few years ago with the boys and his pants ripped right up the back - it was hilarious!

CaraBee said...

I have always wanted to do that! They had a trapeze school here but it started when I was pregnant and I don't think they had it this summer. I'm doing it as soon as I can, though! BTW - I don't think you looked fat at all!

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

You are insane! I mean, brave and adventurous. Yes, that's it!

Anonymous said...

That looks so fun!
And you look great! :)

Ann Harrison said...

Jennifer, I am living vicariously through you!
To call your actions "Awesome" isn't a strong enough phrase!
YAY FOR YOU!!!!
YAY for being the only adult standing in line!
(I was getting dizzy just reading your post.)

Jen said...

Awesome! What a fun thing to do with the kiddos!

MBB Founder and Editor Denene Millner said...

Your kids must think you're the coolest mom on the planet. Seriously.

Michelle said...

You are so brave! Good for you, I bet it was tons of fun! I've been dying to do this since I was a child.