This afternoon I took the kids out for our restaurant adventure (I'll post about it on Saturday). It was WILD!! Anyway, I wasn't the least bit hungry at dinner time, so I passed on it. But then later...it hit me. I HAD to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and I had to have it NOW. (I swear I'm not pregnant.)
I searched around in our way too big and way too disorganized pantry. No sign of peanut butter. Side note: one of my kids has food allergies, so we rarely have peanut products around--but I do keep a jar of peanut butter on a high shelf for "emergencies" just like this.
I couldn't find it in its usual spot, but then I noticed the jar in a strange higher location. Then I couldn't find any jelly. I searched high and low--we didn't have any.
By now, my craving was out of control. There was no way I could continue with my evening until I had this sandwich. So I drove to 7-11 and bought the last jar of strawberry jam (if I wasn't so sure I'm not pregnant I would have bought a pregnancy test too!).
I got home and started assembling the sandwich. But the peanut butter looked weird--really oily--and smelled even weirder. It was totally rancid. It had probably been sitting on the shelf for years. Nooooooo!
I drove back to 7-11 (is that normal?) to get peanut butter. I scanned the little condiment section. Maple syrup--check. Honey--plenty. Mayonnaise--lots. But there was NO PEANUT BUTTER!! How can that be? Wouldn't that be, like, one of the main staples of a convenience store?
I asked the guy behind the counter, who seemed to have no clue what peanut butter was. It was like I was in an episode of the Twilight Zone. I half-expected Rod Serling to step out from behind the potato chip rack rack with his cigarette and say: "Submitted for your approval: Hungry woman in desperate need of peanut butter. But she won't find any peanut butter here...In the Twilight Zone."
"Peanut butter," I pleaded to the guy behind the counter. He seemed to have a glimmer of recognition. Oh thank God. He walked from around the counter and led my toward the back of the store. Toward the refrigerated section? They keep their peanut butter in the refrigerator?
Einstein pointed out the Land 'O Lakes. "Nooo," I begged. "Peanut butter. Like for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich." The guy had No. Clue. Is it possible that some people don't know about peanut butter? Apparently.
I was just about to give up, when I spotted a lone jar of Jif Extra Crunchy on some random shelf. I'm a creamy type--but beggars can't be choosers. I held the jar up triumphantly. "Peanut butter!!" I shouted to the counter guy. He looked at me like I was crazy.
So I got my sandwich and I'm feelin' fine. Though I'm not clear why anyone would choose crunchy over creamy.
I want lots o' comments today--how do you like your PB? With jelly? What kind? With bacon? (I do!) With pickles? (my mom does!). Anyone out there a fan of the extra crunchy? I'm peanut butter-obsessed today!
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