IHOP Stupor and Gender Confusion

Point blank: I don't like going out for breakfast. I like to have coffee at home and maybe something to eat later in the morning like an English muffin or some yogurt. I can't eat doughy, sugary, fatty food in the morning because it puts me into an all-day stupor and I will be worthless for the rest of the day.

This morning Don awakened me out of a beautiful sound sleep and demanded suggested that we go to IHOP . I reluctantly stumbled out of bed, out the door and off to the starch-fest that is IHOP.Mmmmmmmmmm! Nothing says breakfast like pancakes AND candy!! (This wasn't from our breakfast, but still...)

The kids just LOVE it there what with the double-stuffed French toast and chocolate chip pancakes and whipped cream and colorful syrups. It all makes me sick. I ordered Eggs Benedict and only ate part of it--but I still feel liked I've slipped into a foggy coma. My attempts to snap myself out of it (aspirin and a shower) have failed. There's no way I'll get anything accomplished today--IHOP has sucked every ounce of energy out of me.

There was also an uncomfortable "incident" there. It went something like this:

Waitress (all chipper-like): "Well look at this group! You're almost like the Brady Bunch--you just need one more girl!"

Me: "Yeah, except he's a boy" (motioning at Gooser).

Three Older Boys: Hysterical, shrieking laughter.

Gooser: Looks around, confused.

Waitress (looking like she wants to run out of IHOP): Goes into nervous ramble about how nice Gooser's hair is.

Me: "Do you have anything on the menu that won't put me into an all-day stupor?"

Here's the thing--Gooser is a BOY and he has LONG hair. Is there anything wrong with that? The child has beautiful hair and I don't want to give him a typical "boy" haircut--it just won't work on him. Furthermore, HE doesn't want a short haircut-he likes his hair--but I do worry about these constant run-ins we have with people thinking he's a girl. I don't want him to feel self-conscious.

The ridiculous thing is that people ONLY seem to see the hair. He usually wears very typical "boy" clothes--Spiderman t-shirts, little footballs on his Crocs, etc. It's not like he wears dresses!

My mom asks almost every day "When are you cutting his hair?" "Did you get his hair cut yet?" Then she goes on and on about how he'll be an outcast in kindergarten unless he has short hair.

I think I will get his hair cut before kindergarten, but it still won't be super short--maybe I'll have it styled and layered or something and cut a little? I'm feeling a lot of pressure about this. Thoughts? Advice?Thanks a lot, IHOP, for the stupor and the complex!